daaaamn, i ain't updated in a while! guess i been kinda busy, hehe...

anyways, all right, for real though, fo' sho', uuuh...all right, i'm out of that, sooo...onto what i've been up to as of late. Let's see, today, I signed up for boxing classes! No doubt! I'mma prolly get my ass kicked at first, but hey, give it time, give it time...might turn into something! Why boxing? Well, I dunno, really, I mean going to the gym is cool and all, but I need something that's gonna make me fall flat on my face (not from bein punched out, but 'cuz I'm dead tired and I look like those people in the Gatorade commercials, all with like neon sweat and ish! Haha ) Plus, I mean, i need to get lean, I need to start seein' some "cuts" maaaan! I been going to the gym for like a year now and I still only got 3 of the 6 pack! (damnit, y'all knowwhatimean?!) Soo, time for a change, time to get some jump rope and hittin' the bag and all that stuff...and hey, might be a valuable self-defense lesson for later on, ya never knoe! And the crazy thing is, the family that sold me my dog, jaego, it's a guy and his wife, turns out that they are world champion kickboxers! I felt kinda bad now, 'cuz like when I first met 'em, I had no idea who they were and I just acted like they were, ya knoe, ordinary people. Sooo, my new trainer for this boxing thing is the same guy who sold me my dog, the world champ himself! Hahaha. Ohh, I'mma be sore after my first class, boy.  But, at least it will be a good sore, and not that "oh i slept on my shoulder the wrong way" kinda sore. This goin' be like the "damn, i can't feel anything below my neck!" kinda sore. Yea, we'll see how it goes and see how much weight i can lose with going to the gym and boxing! I swear, I better have some definition and cheek-bones by the end of this month!

What else? I finished filming for two movies, so far. That's right, two independent films under my belt, now. I'm semi-celebrity now!  But, for real, filming is fun. I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing than being on camera....actually, nah, wait i take that back. There's a couple things, ya knoe, better than filming, knowwhati'msayin'? Hehehe....

Ah, ok, that's all i wanted to say...hehe, i just wanted to let everyone know i'm takin' a boxing class, haha! Hey someone come and join with me at "The Boxing Club" in La Jolla! I don't wanna get my ass kicked all by myself! I'll be back and let y'all know how the acting career and extracurricular activities is goin' later on, oooh, i'mma kill myself doin' all this ish, damnit! Peace...

Whew...it's been a while since i've updated this thing. Been so busy with trying to balance everything that's goin' on right now, i ain't had the chance to say "hello, xanga." hello, xanga. Hehe, I know i'm retarded.

Oh, by the way, this following entry is long and a bit boring. So, if you're looking for an excuse to not work or finish whatever it is you was doing, then be my guest and read on....

Soo, what's been goin' on? Well, I finally have one film on my resume. Yay! Happy about that. It's nothing big, just a short, short film that's gonna be shown at film festivals and whatnot. Being edited now, as I type. Can't wait to see it. I've never really looked at myself act in front of a camera, so we'll see how it goes. But, I can honestly say that acting is not as easy as some people think it is. It was almost a twelve hour day...for a ten minute film. Ten hours of shooting, for ten minutes of film. Crazy. I was tired at the end of the shoot, everyone was restless, the crew was arguing amongst each other...yea, it wasn't pretty during that last shot. But, it's a job, so someone's gotta do it. Then, I have another short film lined up at the end of this month, a television show in a couple weeks, auditions left and right, yea, been kinda busy, hehe.

Takin' extra acting classes outside of school, those are going pretty well. It's fun to meet people that are kinda in the same boat as I am, but i have to be honest, some of those people need to take a lifeboat back to shore. I mean, i'm not trying to say that i'm the best at what i do, i know i'm not. I suck, even. But, it puzzles me to see these "people" act in class because I wonder how they ever got in in the first place! (you have to audition to get accepted into the class) But, hey, that's what the class is for right? Make us better as an actor. It is overwhelming at times, though. I mean, i never knew how much depth and how much research went into the art of just "acting." I always thought people looked at it like, "okay, i gotta act like this character as soon as the director says 'action' " and bam, they do just that. I was wrong. I found out that good actors not only act like the character, they are the character. I read that sometimes actors even have a hard time trying to "get out" of character and go back to their normal selves. That's crazy! I mean, to think that a person can transform themself into another person and feel exactly what that character feels, and experience that character's background and not "act" in front of the camera, but just be that character in front of the camera....it's amazing. I can only hope someday I will be mentioned with the names like Pacino, DeNiro, Brando, Cruise, Chris Tucker  (haha, i just had to add that last one in) and then, Pabustan. (yea, i'm definately gonna hafta work on my last name....just "considering" for now, no plans are final yet for a change...) Aye, this is a long entry.

All right, well i'm hungry...i just wanted to let xanga and everyone else that reads this, but hasn't heard from me in a while that i'm still alive...still breathin' (barely)...and yea, slowly makin' my way into Hollywood.  Hehe, until the next entry.....

HmmMm.....a list. (of stuff I want or need to do):

• Get better grades and raise my GPA. Yea, acting's been kinda gettin' in the way, oops...hehe
• A new phone. Seems like errone and they mama got that Verizon camera phone ever since they lowered the price.
• Actually go to more auditions. I get called to audition, but all the auditions are in L.A. and I don't wanna drive all the way over there with a 50/50 chance of gettin' the role. Wastes gas and I'm lazy .
• Do more extra work. Who knows I may just get discovered by being in the background of shows and movies. Ya never know...
• Lose more weight. I lost some, or at least that's what people tell me. I can slowly feel it coming back though, damnit. Just a little leaner and I'll be aiight...
• Go visit my parents. Feels like its been so long since I been home.
• Go to church more often and get a lil' more involved. Ah, sadly, still haven't found the right one.
• some other stuff that I can't think of right now cuz' it's 4 in the mornin'. I don't even know why I'm still up.

Ah, guess I feel like I have been pretty lazy this month cuz' of this damn tech rehearsal for my theatre class. Pretty much takes my day and night away most of the time. Feels like I haven't done much for acting, but I guess getting calls to audition is a good step. Even though I don't have the time to, damnit. It's ok, though. Only 3 more shows and I'm goin' back on the Hollywood scene!

Well, hope everyone had a nice Valentine's Day. As for me, well...

All right, so this Theatre Practicum class is pretty much takin' all of my time away. I've been havin' these "tech rehearsals" that last all damn day and go on into the night. I swear it's cuz' of the director they got for this play. Dude is just a couple inches away from "perfectionist insanity."  I work on the lighting design team for this play, "Eurydice," and this play makes absolutely no sense to me, therefore making it even more boring to work the lights over and over and over every single night. But, gotta do what I gotta do for what I want, right? Gotta take the good in with the "boring," extremely boring. So, yea, my Valentine's Day was spent at UCSD's theatre, the whole day, when it's supposed to be a happy day, but I had to dress in all black so no one would see me, so I look like I'm goin' to a damn funeral on V-day. And I'm in the theatre all day, with this insane director, who wants every little single detail perfected to the point where even the actors are startin' to get irritated. I swear they got this director from hell. Look at it this way, the play itself, when fully run, lasts 75 minutes. That's all, it's a really short play......we've been working since last Monday, five hours a day or more, dissecting every little scene so the director will be happy, and we still haven't gotten through a single show. The words I've heard the most this week, "All right, let's do that scene again," and "No, I don't like it at all." I swear, i'll drop something on that director's head from the catwalk during the last show.

On a happier note,  I've appeared in two shows so far, "8 Simple Rules" and "Gilmore Girls." It's fun being in front of the camera, really. The thing is, I don't usually watch these shows so I was like standing next to the stars of the show and talking to 'em as if they were just any other person on set. Oops, I didn't even know it until the make-up person came by and put make-up on them and not me! Mah bad. I really haven't had a chance to go up for any other shows this month though, cuz' of this theatre class, so...goin' on a break for a little bit. Pssh, haven't even really started yet, and I'm already taking a leave of absence. Yea, I was made for Hollywood, all right. Dah well...all right, just thought I'd share my past couple experiences with y'all. Gotta head to bed now, got church and "tech rehearsal" all day tomorrow. So, it's another fun-filled evening of "I'm just not feeling the motivation here" and "Take it form the top" for me....yippee...

All right...

So, I had a conversation with my moms yesterday. Turns out, she's totally unsupportive of my pursuance in acting. (pursuance? is that a real word?) She tells me if I want anything that has to do with Hollywood and movies, then become a director. The reason she's so supportive of me being a director: John Woo. She figures since John Woo made it, and he's Asian, then I have a better chance of making it as a director than an actor. But, you know, I mean there always has to be someone out there, that one person who starts it all, that's gonna change the way people look at Asian actors in America. I thought, "Why can't that be me?" You know what my mom tells me after I tell her that? She laughs at me and tells me to be realistic. There's no way someone like me is going to make that happen....Damn! That really hurts, ya know? I mean, my mom, of all people is like the number one person who strongly believes that I Can't make it! Ouch! But it's ok...ya know, in a way, her not believing in me just pushes me even more to pursue this career and someday, someday I'm gonna prove her wrong. I'll prove 'em all wrong. Boy, wait till my acceptance speech at the Oscars! That'll start a controversy for weeks to come, haha! "Volt Hates His Parents!" Nah, nah, I'm jus' playin,' I don't hate 'em at all, but I will acknowledge the fact that they didn't support me when I was first starting out. Oh, well...

What else? I dunno, I'm bored, I'm broke, and I'm tired....I think I'll take a nap....yea, a nap sounds like fun...

Oh, random story, but a little bit funny...You know how I can tell that most, if not all, the people at UCSD are whitewashed or have some type of identity crisis within themselves? True story happened in my lighting design class...So, I'm sitting in front of these two girls, one is Asian and one is African-American. Now I would have never known that one was Asian and one was Black if I didn't turn around and see what they were...Why? Because the Asian girl is talking to the black girl like this, (and this is a quote and she sounded just like a "gangsta girl") "Girl, why don't u eva use afro-sheen fo' yo' head? Ain't no one likin' that nappy ass flat ish you'se got goins'..." Now, that was the Asian girl...to which the Black girl replied, (in the whitest, valley-girl soundin' voice) "Ah, I don't like want to have like that puffy hair and like those curls and like that hair that is like all out there. If I like do something like that, do you know like what i would look like?!" Then the black girl whispered, "I'll look like a black girl!!"........WHAT?!?! Cuz' u is black!! So, what's the problem? I dunno, just thought I'd share that total identity crisis moment with y'all. K, time for my nap while y'all go figure UCSD people out...